The Past Revisited

"it's too painful"

those were the last words my ex bf said to me when we parted a decade ago. i had asked him if we could remain friends.

i was jolted by a familiar name this morning while reading the comments posted on my friend's status update in FB.

i haven't really thought of him these past few years. he's like a distant memory, like he's from my past life.

and it is such a small world when i found out his family members are connected to some of the people who are linked to me.

i found his sister's FB. i shouldn't have peeked, it's like opening Pandora's box. i was searching for his face, even though i know i shouldn't have. but i did. he's not changed at all. except that he has children, although i don't know which ones are his.

i'm not going to say that the children could have been mine, because truthfully, we can't live together as husband and wife. back then, i was naive, ignorant, and stupid but now i'm wiser and i can fight my own battles.

i don't know if i still love him. but then, it doesn't matter. he's right though, it's too painful to remain friends.